5 Behaviors That Make a Guy Look Desperate

5 Behaviors That Make a Guy Look Desperate

@Dating_Dynamics on X had some great ideas recently on desperation. I wanted tease these out a little.

Remember, starving the simp in your life begins with knowing what behaviors to eliminate.

Here are the top five:

1. Not Knowing When to Quit

This isn't a sales gig or a job application. Trying to convince a girl to hire you for the job won't work once the wrong switches are flipped in her head. Once she gets spooked by the simp ghoul, no amount of logic is going to work in your favor.

Occasionally, a woman will change her mind if she just wants to see a little extra effort. She's either feeding her ego and wanting you to beg for it, or she's testing you to see how dominant you are in destroying her opposition. If you can't tell the difference, you're cooked.

If it's a hard NO, and more than one, you're decreasing your social value and doing waaaaay too much by trying harder. Forcing a square peg into a round hole is ridiculous. Stop trying.

2. Not Giving Her Space

Ever heard this:

"Absence makes the heart grow fonder."

There are so many things wrong with crowding a woman's space. If you're all up in those DMs constantly, text messaging like there is no tomorrow, and never allowing her to miss you or think about you, she's going to get tired of you, fast.

This bleeds desperation like nothing else. Neediness, too. Here's what this spells out for a woman in plain letters:

  1. He has no life of his own
  2. He has no purpose or mission to keep him busy
  3. He has no other options
  4. He's putting me on a pedestal, so he's lower than me

Even in marriage, living under the same roof, couples may need their own space or time. But if you're not married, the last thing you should be doing is invading her space constantly.

Do this instead:

Let her initiate communication through the absences. She'll give you clues as to how much attention she needs. When she does, make her laugh and make sure she knows you've been thinking of her, too. Or, just be present in those moments when you are together. That's enough to let her know you're interested.

Be patient. The absence and need for space will slowly contract as the relationship grows organically.

3. No Answer Is an Answer

I have a solid rule for dating. It's one of my Fifty Rules of Rizz, too. Never ask twice. It applies in-person, via text messaging, or on dating apps. If I ask a woman to connect outside the app or to go on a date and she doesn't respond within a few days, that's her answer.

If I come back later to see a read-receipt, and she hasn't replied, I immediately walk away from it.

Silence and choosing not to reply after making a connection is a sign she's not into you. Plain and simple.

Pretty girls are a dime a dozen. There are plenty of fish in the sea.

Stop simping over women who aren't interested in you. You'll eventually find one who is – as long as you stick to your full-time process.

Tighten up your rizz rule game and move on. Ghosting is just a part of it.

4. Doing Too Much

This could apply to a lot of things.

  • Trying to charm her friends TOO MUCH
  • Giving her TOO MANY gifts
  • Showering her with TOO MUCH attention
  • Calling her TOO OFTEN
  • Remembering TOO MANY things about her and coming across as a creep

There are a million ways you can do too much for a girl. Learn to relax and keep the process in mind. The process of vetting her, not gushing over her. The process of becoming a better man, not needing her to save you from whatever emotional void you have.

If a woman isn't showering you with more attention than you're giving her, who do you think has more leverage in that relationship? The man is supposed to be the god-given leader – the head, the voice of reason, a pillar.

If you're not in control of yourself, how can you expect to lead her?

5. Belittling Other Guys

We may be in the age of Donald Trump where "dissing" other people has become popular, but that doesn't mean it's expedient.

If you're belittling other guys in her life or that she has dated in the past, you're showing how insecure and threatened you are. If those men are a threat to you, then you're with the wrong woman, or your frame isn't strong enough.

True alphas do not compete for women. They will protect them from necessary danger and they will maintain their frame, but if you feel threatened enough to "compete" for her, you've already lost that battle.

Men who are secure in their God-given identity touch something deep inside a woman that makes her feel safe.